Drinking Diamonds

I almost swallowed my brother's earrings today. I'm not used to this whole sharing a bathroom thing after being away at school for so long, and it's especially difficult when its regular occupants consist of 2 teenage boys. Since they're both at school by the time I pull back my curtains and reveal the afternoon sun, i have the whole place to myself, which is nice. What isn't nice is the fact that the restroom looks like a bomb went off; toilet paper roll empty, boxer briefs litter the floor, no clean towels sizable enough to cover my privets... A real disaster. I didn't even bother to examine the condition of shower scum and piss lining the toilet, I know what to expect. All this irritates me enough, because a place where you clean yourself should be equally clean (if the correlation were direct and accurate, my brothers would resemble Pig Pen from The Peanuts and Oscar the Grouch.) But I have no choice but to share this domain, as my house has 2 & 1/2 bathrooms. The other, my parents bathroom, is in their bedroom, and God knows what secrets it holds. So before I rush off to work, where I have been called in early and will have to use an equally disgusting public mall toilet throughout my shift, I have to brush my teeth. Using my own specific whitening toothpaste, which I have warned the satanic siblings for them would  result in ultimate peril,  I brush away in the semi-dark. My bathroom is in the center of the house and natural light is limited to entering through the door. We do have a nightlight, but it runs on a photocell or whatever and it turns off at the glow of the sun, and I hate to turn on the light during the daytime. Spitting out the remainder of white foam, I reach for the cup at the edge of the sink and go to fill it with a bit of water. But there's already water inside, to which I think, "lazy assholes, no toilet paper, now this..." and I dump. With the water, out pours my brother's diamond earrings, into the basin and toward the drain. I'm thinking "shitttttt..." as I catch the second, but luckily the first is lodged in the drain stop. Carefully I pull it out, making sure that it won't slip into the pipe (I had to retrieve one of my gauges from my sink at school before and it was the most vile thing I have ever experienced.) Immediately, I note the bottle of peroxide to the right of the faucet and I am filled with unhampered rage: One, had I been lazy like my stupid brother, I would have drank the water that was already in the cup, which to my surprise would have been peroxide. Two, I could have swallowed the fake studs and choked!  Who in God's name puts their dirty earrings and a chemical compound in a fricking drinking cup? I can't even yell at the twat because he's still at school, probably wearing some dirty earrings with shit in his butt due to absence of tissue... I have to rush to work without the vengeance I desire. After such a stressful semester, oh how it's good to be home.